Balancing Act

By Lora Dow

The Donor By Design team spent a couple of days at a leadership conference last week.  It was a great experience, full of ideas and insights that we’ll be sharing with you here in the blog and – if you’re a client – in our day-to-day work with you.

One of the ideas that made all of us sit up and take notice was the idea that some tensions or problems in organizations are better left unresolved.

Take a moment with that.

Some things are better if you don’t fix them.

The idea, articulated by Andy Stanley, and echoed by other speakers at the conference, is that often healthy conflict can be leveraged to move organizations to higher levels of performance. Stanley encouraged us to consider those issues regarding which you may have said, more than once, “I’m not going to have this conversation again.”  Does it keep coming up again anyway?  Why?

It may be because there truly is no real answer.  It may be a tension inherent to what you’re trying to accomplish: a tension to be managed, not solved.  In these cases, he suggested that a leader must be able to recognize and argue the merits and downsides of each side and more importantly, find the “rhythm” of the tension, recognizing when one side merits priority and then when the other should take focus.

It made me think of a teeter-totter. (remember those?) The point is not to stay balanced in the middle, but to move up and down, back and forth. If one side dominates, the fun is over.

Some conflict is necessary for a healthy organization.  And, indeed, if you play it right, it can be the inspiration for true growth.

So, for example, instead of trying to “solve” the conflict between systems and flexibility, lead through it.  Neither side will “win” if one side “wins.” After all, there is a time and place for both systems and flexibility. 

Challenge each side to see the upside of the other side. Systems-oriented people need to flex a little to accommodate unforeseen circumstances and people who are more oriented to go-with-the-flow need to realize the power of systems and procedures.

You need both.  However, from time to time, they are going to bump up against each other.  Andy’s message to us was “manage it.”  Because in managing the tension (versus ignoring it or forcing the issue one way or the other), your organization will improve.  Systems, where they are needed, will be streamlined and more effective, but your organization will be more nimble to deal with new challenges and opportunities.

This concept doesn’t just apply to businesses or churches.  It also has a deep meaning in a person’s day-to-day life.

Imagine giving up the struggle to find “work-life balance.”  Imagine simply acknowledging that it’s never going to happen perfectly each day, and instead work to find a balanced rhythm between work and home life over time.  Sometimes you’ll need to focus more on your family and sometimes work will be more important.  Can you be OK with that?  And, can you see where allowing yourself to shift back and forth between competing interests allows you to move forward whereas struggling for perfect equality can leave you stymied?

Jim Collins, another speaker at the conference, put it this way:  Great leaders learn to say “and” instead of “or.”  They can balance two competing concepts and make both of them happen.  They know when to make a decision and they know that sometimes those decisions can be “yes” to both sides.

As a group, we spent a lot of time talking about this concept and what it means to us, to our clients and in our own lives.

What do you think?  Is it time to rethink the balancing act?

Last 5 posts by Lora Dow

• Hit Somebody. - January 30th, 2012
• Who will you help? - January 10th, 2012
• Your Mother Was Right - December 1st, 2011
• Back-up Plans - October 13th, 2011
• Visiting Samaria - August 23rd, 2011

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